Untitled — “Who Was the First to Think I Was Bad?”

Translated from the Persian original.

I don't know: who was the first to think I was bad?

I don't remember who first told me I was bad.

I've forgotten when I first thought I was doing something bad.

I never understood how I came to believe I was bad.

I never learned what badness is; maybe if I had, I wouldn't have become bad.

I can't see badness; maybe if I could see it and find it in myself, I would part from it.

I didn't want to be bad; it was an inner guidance.

I don't want to be bad; it is a forced talent.

I don't want to stay bad.

Help me.

Hadi Pakzad, autumn 2010 (Aban 1389)